Tag Archives: Reflection

FIERCE! FLY! & FABULOUS! Journey Post #4 (Stone by Stone)


Some readers may wonder why this post is titled “Stone by Stone.”  In post #2 I wrote that three people on separate occasions told me to be gentle with myself through this process.  I’m notorious for wanting to start the race at a sprint then quickly fad into a light jog.  Once I hit a slow stride I feel guilty about losing speed, stop altogether, and throw the slammin’-est pity party for 1!  Since I’ve begun reclaiming my Triple “F” status God and the Universe has strategiclly placed people along the way to remind me this isn’t a race.  I have time to reach my goals and to enjoy reaching them.  It’s the process that is the best part.  Feeling guilty takes away from that joy.  Letting others get to me about eating something unhealthy or not moving as quickly with certain changes takes away from that joy.  Wanting everyone to connect with every single post (which will never happen) takes away from that joy.  I’m reshaping a mountain.  That takes patience and care.  One day it will look as if the changes were there from the start.  But the transformation of rough stone into a beautiful work of art begins with chipping away 1 pebble.  “Stone by Stone” I am becoming the stunning architectural design God made me to be…

Its been about 5 weeks since I’ve started my Triple “F” Journey.  The process so far has been interesting.  There have been internal struggles and external factors that have made shove a sugary snack in my mouth for comfort.  Hazard of being an emotional eater.  Food is always there as your comforter and companion. 

There have been some great accomplishments since the last post.  First, I started this journey weighing 250lbs.  I currently weigh 244.8 lbs!  I lost 3lbs  this week.  Its great because I’ve been watching what I eat and paying attention to what makes up the foods I eat.  I’m not sure what my caloric intake was before I started my eating changes.  Now I try to eat between 1500 to  2000 calories.  Plus, I’m doing my best not to eat after 9p.  So difficult because that’s when I typically munch.  Water has been a fairly decent substitute for night time candy snacks.  I’m cleaning up my eating act but I noticed something strange.  As a matter of fact I noticed it when I completed a 21-day fast in 2008.  I don’t eat and drink enough period.  I can go an entire morning and early afternoon without eating.  By the time I did eat I’m starving and scarfing something horrible unhealthy.  I’m living proof that you need to eat 3 small meals and 2 snacks a day and eating nothing but junk will pack on the pounds.  I think because I’m not eating so much bad food the pounds are falling off.  (I have enjoyed chocolate chip cookies while being snowed-in this weekend.  They were tasty!!!)

While most of my neighbors in the Washington, DC area are cursing Frosty the Snowman’s visit (Over 30″ of snow was recorded in Dulles, VA) I am loving this time!!!!!  For the last 4 days I’ve been catching up on craft projects, planning events, and blog posts 😉  Its wonderful to reconnect with things I love to do and catch up on so many unfinished tasks.  Not only did I not think about food for long stretches of time, I got back to what makes me happy….CREATING!  I’m most proud of the jewelry I made over the past weekend.  Below are the coveted pair of earrings-

I realize that I have to find balance between what what recharges my SPIRIT and what pays my bill.  I would love to quit my job today and  just write, make jewelry, and paint wooden boxes all day long.  However, I like having  good credit, going on trips, and hitting the hot spots.  So until writing can pay the bills I will have a daytime job.  (And I have a feeling that one day in the not-so-distant future I’ll be a professional writer paying the bills  with my creative works!)  In finding balance I will also have to stop caring for others and take better care of myself.  That means finding time to see through creative projects, having a standing manicure and pedicure appointment (even if it’s at my home spa!) and just doing more that renews my soul not burden it.  I can’t help everyone nor can I please everyone.  Being a people-pleaser is one of my personality flaws.  It often leaves me stressed, angry, and sad.  I’ll never be a successful Triple “F” Threat drained and exhausted.  I’m tired.  No exclamation needed after that sentence.  My soul is tired.  And I am AWAKENING my soul!

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SHUT UP & WAIT! (Election 2008)-1Year Later


*I wrote this piece 1 year and 2 days ago after I cast my vote for President Obama.  I wanted to post this piece because of my awe at the 2009 local and national voter turnout.  Last year there was nearly a revolt the otherwise idyllic Ashburn, VA neighborhood.  This year I swore I saw tumbleweed pass my voter booth!  Its amazing how things change within a year.
 
I am very disappointed in Democrats and Republicans alike.  The voter drop-off  this year was EMBRASSING!!!  Voting for a president and expecting that h/she to change all of our ills is unacceptable.  The last election showed the power of the people.  This election showed how willing people are to give away their power.
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Today, I voted! I happily awoke at 6 am (actually there was plenty of crust in my eyes and I couldn’t believe the alarm didn’t go off) to cast what will be one of the most important votes of my life.

When I arrived at the polling place, the energy seemed pleasant. Happy to have my last name begin with “G”, I strolled up to my line, received my ballot ticket, strolled to the next line, and cast my vote. Total wait time: 45 minutes. But the long line to my left, that curled behind me as well, didn’t have such an easy time. “L-K” folks had a longer wait. Seemed a few people forgot IDs or wanted to chat up the election workers. The energy from the “L-K” folks was negative to put it mildly. A fellow voter in front of me joked with the people to our left about having to wait. One woman said she was ready to throw something at him that’s how angry she felt. She was dead serious. Another man complained from the time I checked in until the time I received my paper ballot about how long his wait had been. Another man complained his back hurt from standing so long and he didn’t understand why he had to wait. It was 7:15 AM and the gripes were beginning.

I listened to the complaints, groans, and moans and sympathized a little. Standing on concrete is unpleasant and bad for the joints. But my sympathy was short. Very, very short.

This is probably one of the most historic elections since JFK took office. The country is at a critical point financially, internationally, and domestically. The economy is in the toliet. Neighborhoods are seeing steep declines in housing values. The US military is stretched thin all over the Middle East (did anyone notice the attack on Syria?). Major corporations are cutting jobs left and right (GM and Ford reported profit losses probably means more jobs lost). Times are rough. And the time for change has arrived.

Election Day is the day that we, American citizens, decide which direction we want to take the country. Record numbers of people are voting for the first time. People who have sat out for years feel a need to exercise their right on this day. So guess what? BE PREPARED TO WAIT!

This is not beauty contest (though at times its felt like it). You’re not choosing high school superlatives. Today’s vote is for future. Where do we want the country to go? Who do we want to begin us on that journey? Everyone has something at stake in this election. A lot of people want their voices heard. Republican. Democrat. Independent. Black. White. Latino. Asian. Woman. Man. Old. Young. The voices are many and they are diverse. And the body that carries those voices are showing out in historic numbers today.

I am proud to wait in line. I am proud to have dragged my butt out of bed. I am proud that I exercised my right to vote. A right that was denied to my family in the past because of their race, gender and in some cases, both. If time is all I have to give to have my voice heard and stand for my beliefs, then time is what I willingly pay.

I undestand that for voting is a burden for some. Time off work means pay lost. And for those, I understand why waiting isn’t acceptable. The election rules should change. Election Day should be a federal holiday where all can take their time to cast their ballot. No one should be forced to decided if going to work trumps voting for the position that greatly impacts their lives.

For everyone else, SHUT UP AND WAIT! Millions are voting today. Until the election rules change, there will be lines because of the process. We can’t vote by text. You can’t phone it in. No, you won’t be allowed to email your vote to the election board. But you can stand and wait.

Think about how important voting is to you and then think how important is to millions of American citizens. We are all waiting for the chance to have our say. We are all waiting. There is no need to get nasty. There is no need to threaten your fellow line mates. When you have an opportunity, tell the election workers your concerns and then lobby your election board to devise a more efficient way to cast ballots. That’s right get involved in your local politics! Become civically engaged!

Everyone is tired. Everyone has something to do today. Everyone wants to cast their vote. Everyone is waiting. So please, SHUT UP and WAIT!